Monday, May 20, 2013

Blog In May: Day 20

Today's prompt:
Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

......*sigh* What to say... what to say... It's not a short list, by any stretch, but part of life is just moving forward and doing what you have to. Right this very second I'd say there are two things that are weighing heavy on my mind.

1. I need a vacation. Like, a for-real go-away for more than one day vacation. I haven't had a proper vacation in 16 years. That was half of my life ago. We've taken a few day trips, but something about the stress of getting back home in time to sleep really diminishes the de-stressing part of going away. Also, while I do love to drive (especially for hours on the highway), being the only driver and having to navigate 6+ hours of traffic can sometimes be more of a headache than it's worth. I keep trying to save up, but once I start putting away a reasonable sum... the car needs work. We need the car in good shape to get anywhere and it's a vicious cycle that's really hard to break out of. Which reminds me... need to see where Midas moved to because I'm going to need new brakes soon... -_- Aaron's a sweetheart, but I have the hardest time explaining this need to him. Since we've been married he's been 'away' for three one-week trips. Two with his friends and one to collect his mother after her husband passed. I stayed here to take care of Elvis. Not something I regret, he needed at least one of his parents especially in the later years. But it's getting to the point where whenever I read about anybody doing anything I just want to cry and throw my computer against the wall. I always always always try to be happy for people when good things happen for them, but I'm starting to lose the ability because "why not me?".

2. The second thing isn't quite as heart-wrenching, but it is deeply bothersome when I do think about it... so it may seem odd that I'm actually trying to think about it more often. It's no secret I've got big ol' boobs. Approximately 38DD. I'm proud of them. I don't like that my back hurts sometimes or that my bra straps dig into my shoulders, but I like having them. I grew them and they're mine. The problem is that I'm getting old. I'm getting old and I was a stupid teenager that went braless more than I should have. So there is a fair bit of sagging going on. Which... I'm not exceedingly vain. I always told myself I'd try to age gracefully... but... how do I put this delicately... it's not "normal" sagging. The nipples have made their way southward and I am not happy about it. Aaron says it's not that bad and he's still, after nearly 13 years, enamored with my boobs; but it bothers me. Especially when I see it in pictures. I make sure to get an arm under there and lift my girls back up where they belong and it's his job to make sure nothing's... askew. :p So. Yes. I have one really nice push-up bra that I wear and I'm trying to get into the habit of slathering my girls with cocoa butter lotion on top to try and coax the skin into tightening back up a bit. I'm not expecting miracles, but even a little bit would help. I've also read that rosehip oil is supposed to be good for skin elasticity, but haven't been able to find a lotion with it already in there. As a last resort I've read some good things about emu oil. Which I did research and (here in the states anyway) emus are not raised for just their fat. Actually emu farms harvest the meat, fat, skin (for leather) and feathers off of the same animal. Which is a far better practice than some animal-related-product industries... Incidentally, emu burgers are pretty good if you're not vegetarian/vegan and have a chance to try them.

And Aaron's awake so now I'm struggling with not wanting to throw something at him. "Check this out" every 30seconds while I'm trying to type. :p lol Anyway, those are my most immediate concerns. I think I'm going to go ahead and post this now. Work on that sock some while I wait for the sun to come up and Ulta to open. I think I need a bit of retail therapy after this.... what?! Don't give me that look. I gots a 20% of coupon so I could be coming back with a new PixieDust to show you. ;)

Tomorrow's prompt:
A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives

Ha-ha! I saw this one a week ago so I've already got my list. Hint: None of them are polish related!


  1. Umm that second one is incredibly personal man lol but I can really relate -_-
    During puberty I gained a heck lot of weight and my boobs got really big and after I lost a lot of it my boobs sort of deflated a big.... I have some serious stretch marks along the tops of them. And yea, they are pretty darn droopy if you ask me. I think they look acceptable when I raise my arms lol but without a bra, they look sad.
    But yea, I accept them as they are and honestly I think boobs are all sort of the same to guys, droopy or not haha
    Also emu oil?!?! :o Never heard of that
    P.S Julep... You skipping this month?

    1. aw *hugs* My bestie has the exact same issue! She got really big when she was pregnant (and for awhile after) and now she's all petite, but like you said her boobs just sort of deflated. :/ I'm glad that you're able to accept them as they are. I wish I was confident enough to not worry about mine. I came across emu oil information while searching for non-surgical ways to help saggy boobs. Apparently they refine the fat and it's supposed to be almost like a miracle oil for saggy, wrinkly, stretched out skin. Haven't tried it yet, though.
      P.S. - yeah... I wanted to try the cream and concealer, but I just can't justify $10/each for stuff I can get for under $5 and barely use. The polish colors are alright, but I'd rather just hang onto the $20 for now.

    2. That sounds promising but I am always skeptical of stuff like that. I tried Bio oil before, didn't do anything :/

      I am not really interested in the "DD" cream or concealer, because yea like you said, good BB creams can be bought for under 10$. But I really like that muted reddish orange, maybe I'll get it later using the 50% off code when it is sold on its own....

    3. Oh yes! I have the 50% off, too. lol Maybe I'll poke around the site later when I'm bored and start writing down ones to research swatches for. ;)

  2. (((Lizzy))) vacations are definitely needed and I can sympathize with the not wearing a bra now my big boobs are sagging thin *sigh*

    1. (((Norma))) Our poor boobs... They're the real victims in all of this. ;) Although, if bras were more comfortable it would be less of an issue. As it is I'm trying to ignore the wire poking into my armpit... -_-

    2. Amen! WHY are bras so uncomfortable yet necessary?!

    3. I wish I knew. Was looking at bras in Target (since it was on my mind anyways) and all the ones in my size were so ugly.... *ugh* Might have to try Kohl's again. At least they have a big selection... even if they are a tad pricey.


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